Linda McCartney Mini Pork & Apple Sausage Rolls

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Contains: palm oil, wheat, soya

Free From: nuts

My Nana always makes sausage rolls from scratch EVERY YEAR for Christmas. It’s her thing, along with guilting me for being vegan and not eating her sausage rolls that she made from scratch specially for Christmas.

Personally, I don’t believe that sausage rolls should be restricted to being a once-a-year, special occasion snack food. Sausage rolls are pretty much the backbone of British food culture; try and name a single town here that doesn’t have  a Gregg’s trying to flog mashed up pig wrapped in flaky pastry.

These little Linda sausage rolls are bite-sized and beautiful. Easy to cook, easy to eat, less easy to stop yourself eating half the packet…

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Brushing the rolls with a milk alternative is a must to give it a golden, buttery look and taste. I used Alpro Soya Light and it worked like a charm. If you manage to not shove a whole roll in your mouth and you actually take a human sized bite, you’ll notice that good god DAMN this is some flaky pastry. This shit is PERFECTION. What is even the point in eating sausage rolls if you don’t end up with pastry flakes all over you, alerting everyone in the vicinity that:

A) There are sausage rolls near by, and

B) You have no shame.

The filling is good but to be honest I was expecting a little more sweetness from the apple, and that’s where these fall a bit flat for me. The texture of the filling is great and holds its form when you bite into it, and it tastes a hell of a lot like classic pork stuffing which means omnis probably wouldn’t notice a difference between your standard cheap sausage roll bites.

Being an absolute trash human, my solution for any mildly disappointing food is to squeeze a fuck tonne of ketchup all over that shit. It definitely improved my opinion of these sausage rolls seeing as I went on to eat another five, all smothered in tomatoey sugary goodness.

In the name of equality, I also tried them out with HP brown sauce, as my Nana would argue that putting ketchup on a sausage roll is like showing up to Christmas dinner one year having shaved half of your head (i.e. “what the fuck have you done you have RUINED CHRISTMAS”*).

(Sorry Nana)

FYI brown sauce works just fine too…

Overall these mini sausage rolls are the perfect party food as you can guarantee they’ll all be eaten with pretty much no complaining, but they’re also no show-stopper and are kinda forgettable.

  • My Score – 3/5
  • Omnivore Score – 4/5
  • Overall – 3.5/5

Find this product at: most supermarkets and some alternative food stores.

*not an exact quote

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